The Recessional

What is a recessional?

A recessional, in the context of a wedding ceremony, is simply how the wedding party and guests will exit the space in which the wedding ceremony took place.

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Often very little attention is given to this aspect of the wedding ceremony. This is unfortunate because the recessional is a most celebratory time. The ending of one event is the beginning of the next. The recessional is the transition from the sacredness of the ceremony to the festivities to come.

The recessional quite literally marks the steps that are taken together that begin the journey forward as a married couple. For this reason consideration should be given to the exit order. It would be fitting that those closest to the newlyweds follow in closest proximity. This would be symbolic of those who will support and accompany the married couple through their married life.

Recessional 2

The wedding recessional, while celebratory, is also practical. It ensures that there is an orderly exit rather than a rush for the door. More detail will be provided to explain the exit order, and what works best for religious venues, other indoor venues, and outdoor gatherings.

As with all aspects of the wedding, the recessional should be explained and practiced during the rehearsal. Do not leave this to chance. If the recessional is clumsy, awkward, and does not flow smoothly, it will take the focus away from the moment.

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It is also a good idea to have the photographer attend the rehearsal. This will alert the professional as to where she/he should be positioned to capture the moment at its best. It is also an opportunity to preserve those more informal moments that take place within the context of lightheartedness during the rehearsal. Great informal snapshots can be captured when people are at ease, having fun, and enjoying each other’s company.

Things that should be considered include, what is the signal during the ceremony that indicates the recessional is about to take place? What is the exit order of the wedding party and guests? What will be the music selection played during the exit?

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Those gathered will want to know, what happens next. This is a great time in the ceremony to provide a few bits of important information to give clear direction. It will avoid the guests feeling confused and wondering, “what now?” The announcements should include a brief description of what happens next, where guests should go or gather, and what to expect? Ensuring that everyone is aware of what happens next will create an organized flow of movement and put everyone at ease.


5 Things to Consider

  1. What will signal to those gathered that the recessional is about to begin?
  2. What will be the order of the recessional?
  3. What will be the musical selection for the recessional?
  4. What happens immediately following the recessional and how will the guests be informed?
  5. How and when will the guests participate in the recessional celebration?


What signals that the recessional is about to begin?

The vows have been said, the rings or tokens have been exchanged, and the pronouncement has been made as in, “I now pronounce you husband and wife”. What would follow next is the benediction or closing statement. 

You will see in another section examples of what might be said to bring the ceremony to conclusion. Immediately following the benediction or closing words, the music should begin, and the recessional commence leading with the bride and groom walking hand in hand back down the aisle from which they entered. 

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Usually the music is upbeat, joyous, with the pace of the exit a bit faster than the processional. Take into account that the exit pace, while faster, should not move toward a jog or run. Women are typically in high heeled shoes. There may be long or constricting dresses. Wedding party participants may be holding flowers, baskets, etc. Men may be wearing new or formal footwear that could be unfamiliar to them. Taking a tumble at the end of the ceremony would be a most unfortunate conclusion causing a distraction that takes the focus away from the beautiful crescendo of the ceremony.

What is the order of the recessional?

The choice is up to the happy couple, however, it would be common and appropriate for the exit to be the mirror image of the processional. In other words, the newlyweds should exit first followed by those in the wedding party.

Today there is much more equality in relationships that may challenge tradition. This inclusivity may be something that would be appropriate depending on the lifestyle, values and customs of the married couple.

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Specifically, flower girls do not have to be girls, and ring bearers do not have to be boys. Brides can have male attendants and grooms can have female attendants. The names or titles of these roles do not matter as much as the meaning behind who is selected to take part in specific roles. As with everything, there is room for creativity. Consider combining these roles, or have a junior attendant carry a sign that says, "Here comes the bride!"

Therefore the following reflects traditional terminology but keep in mind gender is not the issue. Your relationship with the participants is what is most important. 

  1. Bride and Groom
  2. Flower and ring bearer
  3. Maid of Honor and Best Man
  4. Bridesmaids each accompanied by an usher or groomsmen
  5. Bride’s parents
  6. Groom’s parents
  7. Bride’s grandparents
  8. Grooms’ grandparents
  9. Wedding guests in the order of front to back, row following row

Typically, as when exiting an aircraft, people are courteous and at a wedding, guests even more so. Follow the leader is in order. Given that the seating arrangements honor the parents and grandparents of the married couple, each row would almost naturally follow without instruction. 

The order can tend to fall apart especially in outdoor settings where conversation, alternate exit routes and a sense of being casual is present. This usually happens long after the bride and groom have made their exit and is not of concern. Most importantly, you want everyone to have a good time and not be too bound by protocol.


What will be the musical selection for the recessional?

Music is often an exciting que that brings everyone to the attention of the moment. That is why at a horse race, a bugler signals that all jockeys and horses should be ready to proceed to the track. It is why the trumpeters play to announce the entrance of royalty. Such fanfare may precede an important and significant business event. Even the opening of the daily stock market begins with the traditional ringing of the bell.

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Therefore, it is exciting and appropriate that some signal of sound announce that two have become one, and that a new life together has begun. It is the time for profound recognition of those at the center of the celebration.

Most often this is with a selection of upbeat, majestic music. Traditionally, we often hear Mendelssohn’s “Wedding March” or Beethoven’s “Ode to Joy”. But you do not have to follow tradition. Personally, if there is the option of a powerful orchestra, or multi keyboard pipe organ, I would go with Mendelssohn. But that is personal bias. You will have better ideas. The idea is to select the accompaniment that suits your personality and relationship. It may be violins, bag pipes, bell gingers, trumpets or a host of other options.

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If you choose a recessional to the sound of ringing bells, consider having four to eight elegantly dressed men and women enter down the aisle with bells in hand at the conclusion of the Benediction. This would need no other musical accompaniment. The “ring” bearers (pun intended), would lead the recessional just in front of the bride and groom.


What happens immediately following the recessional and how will the guests be informed?

This is an important detail, and details make a tremendous difference. If there is information of which the guests need to be made aware, announcements should be made just prior to the Benediction. Making announcements immediately prior to the Recessional is anti-climactic and spoils the anticipation of the moment.

Announcements that are relevant include information about what will happen immediately following the recessional. Such an announcement might be something like:

Announcement 3

This makes it clear that everyone is invited, that there will be refreshments, and everyone should move to that location. Of course any special information or instruction should be included but only if it directly relates to what guests need to know as a next step in the events of the day. Again, announcements are for sharing only need to know information.


How and when will the guests participate in the recessional celebration?

The guests participate in the recessional by following the wedding party down the aisle and out the door. This in itself is inclusion.  Each guest feels the energy and joy that is part of this concluding feature of the wedding ceremony.

Confetti

Throwing rice, confetti, or blowing bubbles is often seen in movies and typically demonstrated as an event that takes place as the bride and groom exit the gathering space, church, synagogue or temple.

That is what happens in the movies. How can those gathered throw rice or confetti if they leave the auditorium after the bride and groom? They are not positioned to do this.

The throwing of good cheer, in whatever form, should be well outside the entrance, and done as the couple leaves for the reception. Many venues do not allow confetti and some do not allow rice. Bubbles in my opinion are opportunities to stain clothing; clothing that has been specifically selected as “one’s best”. I just don’t like bubbles but the choice is yours.