A few things worth having on the day
David's Picks for Your Wedding Ceremony
Standing at the front of a lot of weddings teaches you that the small things matter. A candle meets a breeze. Sand needs somewhere to go. Somebody has to know exactly whose pocket the rings are in.
So here are the few things I'd actually tell a couple to buy. It isn't a store. It's a short list, with what to look for and why, and a link to the part of the site that explains how to use each one.
The quick version
- A short list of ceremony items, picked for how they work on the day, not how they look in a catalog.
- Each pick says what to look for, so you can choose the one that fits your wedding.
- Every pick links back to a guide on this site that shows you how to use it.
A plain word about the links: some links on this page are affiliate links, including Amazon. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases. It costs you nothing extra, and it helps keep this site free. I only list things I would suggest to my own family.
On this page
From my own shelf
These are things I made myself. Start here if you're planning the ceremony words or the budget.
For the ceremony itself
These are the items that show up at the front of the room. Each one has a job to do, so buy for how it works first and how it looks second.
Unity ritual
Unity candle set
Look for: a pillar candle with two taper candles, a sturdy base, and glass hurricane covers if you're outdoors.
If there's any chance of a breeze, get the glass covers. Nobody wants to stand there relighting a candle while the whole room holds its breath.
Unity ritual
Sand ceremony set
Look for: a center vase with a lid that seals, two pouring vases with wide mouths, and a small funnel.
The lid matters most. You'll want to take that vase home and keep it, and sand without a lid ends up all over the car.
The rings
Ring box
Look for: a small wooden or velvet box with two ring slots and a lid that holds firmly shut.
Give the rings to one grown-up you trust, in a box that closes. A ring tied to a pillow on a four-year-old is sweet, but it's a gamble.
Your vows
Vow books
Look for: a matching pair of small hardcover books, sized to hold in one hand, with plain pages you can write in.
Please don't read your vows off a phone. A little book looks lovely in the photos, and afterward it's something you'll keep.
For your officiant
Officiant ceremony binder
Look for: a slim, plain binder or folio in black, white or a soft neutral, with sheet protectors inside.
Every officiant should have a clean binder with the script in sheet protectors. Pages blow away outside, and a rumpled sheet of paper looks out of place in the pictures.
After the signing
Marriage certificate holder
Look for: a padded folder or a frame sized to your state's certificate, with acid-free matting.
The legal license goes back to the county. The keepsake certificate is the one that hangs on your wall for fifty years, so give it a proper home.
For honoring someone who is missed
Almost every wedding has someone who should be there and isn't. A small, quiet place to remember them is one of the kindest things you can do on the day.
Remembrance table
"In loving memory" frame or sign
Look for: a simple standing frame or small sign with room for a photo, in wood or white.
Keep it simple. A photo, a few words and a flower say enough. Guests will stop there on their way in.
Remembrance table
Memorial lantern or candle
Look for: a lantern with an LED candle inside, so it stays lit all day without anyone tending it.
Go battery-powered. A real flame on a table nobody is watching is one more thing to worry about.
For bringing your guests in
I have always liked the rituals that let guests take part, not just watch. These are a couple of the simplest.
Guest ritual
Smooth stones and paint pens
Look for: flat, palm-sized river stones and a set of fine-tip oil-based paint markers that won't smudge.
Guests write a word or a wish on a stone, and you keep them in a bowl at home for years. It costs very little and it means a great deal.
Guest book
Drop-box guest book
Look for: a wooden box or frame with a slot on top and small wooden hearts guests can sign and drop in.
More guests will sign a little wooden heart than will write in a book, and it makes a nice thing to keep on a shelf.
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